I hope they like me… will they see me for who I am? … should I act differently? … Is it obvious that I’m nervous? … I hope I won’t be judged for my appearance… I hope I don’t give a bad first impression.
First impressions are an inevitable part of one’s life, whether they are fair or unfair, incorrect or accurate, they are a part of life. Our initial perception and interpretation of another person/people usually involves a positive or negative “evaluation”, as well as a sense of physical and psychological characteristics. They can make one feel insecure and vulnerable, misjudged, and scrutinised, as well as inferior and small. However, first impressions are different for us all; some of us may become jittery and shy, whilst others are confident and well-spoken. For us “mere mortals”, a first impression does not convey the whole image of who we truly are, but then again, that’s the beauty of being human; you cannot truly know someone from a first impression. Just like our planet Earth, we are each made up of many layers.
Our first impressions are influenced by several factors, such as facial shape, vocal inflection, attractiveness and general emotional state. Some of us may also be self-critical after an initial conversation and wrongly assume we have made a bad first impression; psychologists call this tendency of underestimate one’s likeability, the “liking gap”. We may also be fooled by the “spotlight effect,” which leads us to believe that others are hyper-focused on us, judging every imperfection, awkward question, or bad joke. However, we forget that most of us have doubts and insecurities when it comes to first impressions (and life in general), trying to weave the best image of ourselves when needed/wanted.
It is also common for an individual to interpret other people’s perceptions of them, also known as “metaperception”. For example, thinking highly of oneself is naturally beneficial towards for a good first impression, as it boosts confidence; hence those who believe they are viewed positively by others, tend to have a higher self-esteem. This is evidently not as easy it sounds because gaining self-confidence and courage in yourself takes time and perhaps even practice. However, metaperception has also been widely studied within the realm of narcissism, as these individuals tend to view themselves as confident, agreeable, and friendly. Their high self-esteem may make them seem charming and attractive initially, but this first impression can quickly wither over time.
So, should we really trust our first impressions? On the one hand, we might completely and in-accurately judge someone, yet on the other hand, we might get an idea of the characteristics/personality of the individual. However, a first impression does not mean we know the individual and visa-versa, it is only a glimpse of the surface of their personality. First impressions are simply a human characteristic and it depends a lot on the individual, culture and environment in which we meet others that distinguishes the type of first impression we feel from another and give to another.
Dolphinmind 